Jerkface Tinkerbell’s Guide to Life

Helmets are optional — especially for douchebags.

Photo by Karsten Winegeart on Unsplash

My daughter is ten. She wears purple ski pants with pink and black paint splatters on them. Her ski helmet is white with a big pink dot on the top like something from a candy shop. She’ll tell you she’s a hardcore skier, but when you see her on the slopes, with her blond hair and pink cheeks, she looks like an adorable woodland fairy wrapped in…



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Emily Kingsley

I mostly write about animals, including the human kind. Dead or alive. Also body parts. Contact me at She/her.