Emily Kingsley
1 min readSep 27, 2020

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I read this a few days ago, but it's been on my mind ever since. It reminds me of my first job at a middle school where the principal was a very short, very heavyset woman and the assistant principal was a 6'7" male former college basketball player.

At student assemblies or gatherings, when she needed to address the whole crowd, the tall, loud man would give a little whoop or shout to get everyone settled down. Then the short, female principal would step up and deliver her message.

At the time, I didn't think much of it, but looking back, it just feels so unfair that she had to rely on him to grab everyone's attention for her. And at the same time, his voice was louder. He was taller and easier to see in a crowd.

Why wasn't she the one shouting to settle everyone down? Maybe it's because she was shorter and quieter. And maybe it's because we're just conditioned to listen to men and men are conditioned to be loud because we know they will listen.

I don't know what to do about any of this except, I guess, write like a man--assume that everyone will be delighted by what I have to say and never second guess myself? Maybe? Am I second guessing myself right now? Ugh.

Thanks for a thought provoking read.

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Emily Kingsley
Emily Kingsley

Written by Emily Kingsley

Always polishing the flip side of the coin. Live updates from the middle class. e.kingsleywhalen@gmail.com. She/her.

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